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Kathy Marshack News

Married to Someone with Asperger’s? You Are Not Alone

Tuesday, January 07, 2014


You Are Not AloneMuch has been learned about Asperger’s Syndrome since Viennese pediatrician Hans Asperger first described it in the early 1940’s. As more becomes known of this Autism Spectrum Disorder, those who live with it will be treated with more dignity and respect. More programs will be created so they can function in the world they have trouble relating to.

On the other hand, not enough is said about people who feel alone because a family member has Asperger’s Syndrome. That’s why I wrote my book, “Out of Mind – Out of Sight, Parenting with a Partner with Asperger Syndrome.” I know the emotional pain you’re going through. And I have a comforting message for you – “YOU ARE NOT ALONE”.

I was thrilled that the Kirkus Indie Review of my book focused on that message. Let me share the review with you.

It calls Out of Mind – Out of Sight “A useful and enlightening guidebook offering new insights and practical advice for dealing effectively with a spouse or child diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome.” It goes on to say…

“In Part 1, she discusses common behaviors of people suffering from Asperger’s and of “neurotypical” family members who are not impaired but trying to cope. She offers a poignant account of her own bewildering experience raising her eldest daughter, whose Asperger’s presented itself well before the diagnosis was generally understood by the medical community. Readers will empathize with the author’s “helicopter mom” behavior with her socially impaired child and will feel her pain as she’s ultimately forced to let her daughter go.

In Part 2, Marshack reveals the condition as essentially an empathy disorder and discusses the works of experts such as Simon Baron-Cohen (who studied neuroscience and empathy disorders), Adam Smith (who advanced the Empathy Imbalance Hypothesis) and Peter Vermuelen (who examined the concept of “context blindness”). She also introduces the idea of “Rules of Engagement,” which sufferers can use as a way to relate to people without feeling true empathy.

Parts 3 and 4 offer additional insights into the lives of neurotypicals, who often feel invisible and ignored, and elaborate on coping strategies introduced in earlier chapters. The author mercifully keeps the clinical jargon to a minimum, and the prose is cogent and well-organized throughout. At the end, she provides links to online support groups, websites, phone numbers and other helpful resources. Her personal accounts of her family life and clinical practice should resonate with readers seeking to understand Asperger’s and may help to assure them that they are not alone.”

Please, if you have Aspie family members, know that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I’m here to support you and give you the benefit of my years of experience so you can cope and thrive in your family. If you know someone who would benefit from this information, please share it with them, so they too can receive this comforting message. You can read more about my book, “Out of Mind – Out of Sight’ here.

Out of Mind – Out of Sight is available at Amazon.com in a paperback or Kindle edition edition. Check it out today and begin the healing process.


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